Repost: HYDROXY-NUTS (Me, Myself & I)
While I have many blog posts of substance that I am proud of from 2011, this one is my all time favorite.
How nuts do we have to be to pick up a weight loss supplement at Walmart when we also have M&M’s in our shopping cart? I picked up the box because it said 100% Caffeine–Free. We didn’t think it would be dangerous like brands that give us super energy which cause Me to lose the weight anyway, because I can’t sit still, making Myself too busy to eat.
So we came home and sat down with the box of America's #1 Selling Weight-Loss Supplement Brand AND a handful of M&M’s to read the instructions:
• Take one serving (2 pills), with a glass of water three times a day (That’s already more water than we drink in a day)
• Do not snack between meals
• Do not snack after dinner
• Drink 8 to 10 glasses of water per day
Me: “This isn’t going to work”.
Myself: “I know right. If you drink at least three glasses of water and I don’t snack between meals or after dinner Myself will lose weight anyway!”
I: “And save us $18 in the process!”
According to the directions, this 6 pill a day regimen should be followed 8 to 12 weeks WITH diet and exercise in order to be effective.
We do the math. Sixty pills in the box = 10 day supply. In 12 weeks, we would waste a little over $150 on pills. Common sense tells us that following the directions on the box without the pills would probably yield the same results.
We agree to do better. Me will drink more water, Myself will step it up with the exercise routine and I will cut out SOME of the snacks.
Pills and receipt are put in a bag this morning to return to Walmart. Approaching workout time we have an attitude.
Me: “What’s your problem?”
Myself & I: “We don’t feel like doing this.”
Me: “Let’s don’t do it then”.
Me, Myself and I did it anyway. We worked out, drank plenty of water, had a healthy breakfast, returned the pills to Walmart and bought some more M&M’s.
Me, Myself and I: “What ?!”